Field Note #002 - Alignment
a·lign·ment
/əˈlīnmənt/
noun
a position of agreement or alliance.
Are you in alignment with the version of yourself you want to be?
I'd seen that question a lot and I had NO idea what it meant. Upon doing some research, it seemed that every person that found the answer had hidden it in a 4-week paid program to "Find Your Destiny." So obviously, I had to figure it out myself.
I asked myself guiding questions, thought of every possible future, and talked to people who seemed to have it together. Still, no answers came to me. I felt myself starting to spiral. Who DO I want to be? And how do I figure that out?
I'd go on a social media doom scroll for inspiration. Maybe I want to be the influencer who is always in a different country. Or maybe, the hard working fashion designer that only leaves their design cave for a trade show. OH! Maybe I want to be a tradwife, homesteading in the middle of nowhere, living that slow farm-life (which by the way, is STILL a lot of work).
With each version of a life I could have, I'd find a reason for why those paths weren't meant for me. I started getting frustrated. Envy reared it's sneaky little head and got me thinking - what do they know that I don't? What are they doing that I'm not?
Suddenly, one of the little voices in my head had asked me, "Why do you even want that life? It's not yours!" That's when things shifted. Why was I so obsessed in crafting a future I had never wanted to be in? Trying to figure out how to become a version of myself I didn't care to meet.
It was time to redirect my focus from everyone else's definitions of success to finding my own. So, I stopped scrolling and started to do reflections with myself.
Here's what helped:
Start with your question.
Some examples:
Who do I want to be?
Where do I see myself in 5 years?
What is my dream job?
What makes me happy?
Keep your answer simple, direct, yet somewhat vague. You want to be able to truly understand your purpose with this.
"I want to be the CEO of a company."
Wish Granted: You are now CEO of Walmart. Good luck!
Try digging a little deeper into why this is your goal. What feeling are you trying to envoke? What is your “Why?”
Why do you want to be a CEO? What does that mean to you? What impact are you trying to make?
Instead, you could frame it as:
"I want to be someone that people look to when things are uncertain. I want to be a leader that people trust and want to follow out of respect rather than fear."
Now THAT is a goal you can march to. And the motivation behind it (or your “Why?”) is intrinsic, meaning the drive to accomplish this comes from your own internal, personal motivation rather than external validations.
And the best part? Your success isn't measured by a title or a dollar amount, but by the feeling you give and receive from achieving this goal, and that feeling continues to evolve as you do.
This is the beginning of crafting your identity, coming into true alignment with who you feel you are meant to be. Release the idea of your success being defined by external validations, and link it to internal emotion. Nobody can take away what you feel about yourself if you don't let them.
"With the right alignment, everything you want makes its way into your experience. You are the keeper of your own gate."
- Esther Hicks